Sunday, June 4, 2017

The Bubble Bursts

Just as I was getting used to spending time with that sweet-mannered, kind guy I mentioned in my last post, it ended.

I thought he liked me as much as I liked him (maybe more?) and I'd even started planning things in advance (shock horror), but for the second time I ran before I walked.

We were set up by a mutual friend and our first date was a very casual catch up on a Sunday afternoon. So casual I had a milkshake and drove. Such a rebel.

I thought the date went okay but I wasn'y on my A game by any means. We parted ways after an hour and a half and I didn't think I'd hear from him again.

But, alas, he messaged a few hours later saying it was really lovely to meet me and thanked me for giving up my Sunday afternoon and he wanted to see me again.

This is just one of the examples of how this guy was different from the rest. Perhaps this is what piqued my interest.

When I was mulling over the potential of a second date I thought back to what we spoke about during the first one.

I mentioned I had a cat (in a non-crazy cat lady way) and I remember him asking me what sort of cat Millie was?

I didn't think much of it at the time, but looking back, he is the first guy to ever ask me about my cat and he didn't have to.

But that's what nice guys do.

I wasn't the best version of myself on that date yet he still wanted to see me again. This meant something.

I'm ashamed to admit it took me 24 hours to reply to his text, but when I did I said I, too, was keen to see him again so we lined up a mid-week movie date that week.

He was so excited to go to the movies that he offered to buy the tickets online, picked up the candy bar bill and also paid for our early dinner and drinks beforehand.

He is the type of guy who doesn't think twice about paying for a lady on a date and it was so nice to be treated like one.

After the movie he offered to drive me home but I said it was out of his way and I said I would just take the bus.

Everyone I told that story to asked why not? Why didn't I let him drive me home? I guess the number one reason was I'd never had anyone ask before and I didn't know how to respond.

In the meantime, we organsie to go to Bluesfest at Byron Bay for a day over the Easter weekend. He was keen to pay for his ticket, but I said don't worry, he'd been paying for all our other dates.

So date #3 rolls around and he wants to take me to dinner and offers to pick me up so I accept and we have a lovely dinner.

I'd gone to the bathroom and he paid and as I was walking back I see he's on the phone. Didn't think much of it. He had been waiting to hear from his boss about what time he was starting work the next day so I assumed it was him.

We walk out of the restaurant and he says he's starting at 7.30am. I ask if that was his boss on the phone? His reply? It was my ex.

To say it was a conversation killer doesn't even come close. I didn't know what to say, he didn't know what to say so we ride home in silence most of the way.

I ask if he wants to come in when we get back to my place, he does for about 15 minutes and we sit awkwardly on the couch, then he says he's got to go.

I walk him out and think, right, surely we've got to have our first kiss now?

I am standing next to his van, he's standing there looking at me. It's awkward. Seconds are ticking by and we're looking at each other. You get the picture.

I was waiting for him to make the next move. The move he makes is jumping into his car and driving away pretty quicky. I was suprised and of course wondered what just happened?

I message him later to see he'd gotten home and just touched on what happened (or didn't) earlier. He said he freaked out, didn't know what to do and I said we had plenty reasons to look forward to the next date.

Turns out we saw each other the next day and we spent about seven hours together. We watched Netflix, drank, ate and got to know each other more.

Yes, we finally kissed and if I'm totally honest, I didn't feel any spark.

But you know what? That didn't bother me. I thought we could keep getting to know each other, and may, just maybe, the sparks would come.

I'm -not sure what he was thinking, but 24 hours later I get the "it's not you, it's me" text.

One of my first thoughts is I now I have $320 worth of Bluesfest tickets and the second was a day after I kiss a guy, I get a text saying thanks but no thanks.

Does a lot for a girl's self esteem.

In his defence he felt "it" wasn't there and he said it was the same with his ex. I was a nice girl, intelligent, blah blah blah.

I replied after an hour saying I was surprised, thought things were going well and I wished him the best.

He replied and said thanks for replying and he wished me well.

Damn it, why did you go and be a nice guy again???!!!!
Oh, and those Bluesfest tickets I had? A good friend stepped up and we went together.

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