The ghoster with the $339 sunnies

I'm 41 years old and I 've been ghosted. Again. But this time I got a pair of $339 sunglasses out of it.

The guy left his sunnies at my place the last time we'd seen each other. I assumed (as you do) I'd give them back to him when I saw him again.

But the days turned into a week, then two and I realised those sunglasses staring back at me on the dining table need to be out of my sight.

I hid them in a cupboard for a day, then was going to throw them out and decided to Google them first.

Good thing I did as they were OTIS sunglasses which have a special mineral lense and retails at $339.

I was telling a friend about them and she suggested I sell them on Marketplace. Hadn't thought of that!

Great idea, I mean, the least I can do is get a few hundred dollars from this shitty situation.

However, I made the mistake of telling my brother about them and he asked the brand and after telling him OTIS he was very excited. 

They're his preferred sunnies, he said, he didn't have any at the moment, he said.

My first response? "So this means I'm not going to get any money from selling them on Marketplace??!"

No.

My brother is now the proud owner of said sunnies (if he hasn't lost them already).

Meanwhile, I am left with the memories of yet another failed match on Bumble and dating in general..

I guess you want to know more about the guy though and not the sunglasses...

In my experience when something seems too good to be true, it usually is.

Once we matched on Bumble our messages were immediate and lasted sometimes hours each day.

It was like we were getting to know one another in real time, not having to wait hours for a reply.

We had a conversation back and forth for hours. The hours turned into days and we were soon planning our first date.

He is one of very few guys I've met whose photos don't do him justice. He was better looking in real life, which is always a relief.

The chemistry was there and we had no problem keeping the conversation going.

After the first date cracks appeared in his stories. 

During our initial messages he said he was living with his sister and would take over her unit when she moved at the end of the year.

He has a dog and also a daughter (which I knew about).

What he didn't mention was he was a 39-year-old man who was living at his parents' place and his mum looked after his dog, along with their own dogs.

He hadn't moved into his sister's place yet. For all I know, his mum did his laundry and made his bed!

After leaving his sunglasses at my place he went away for a week's work. I stupidly assumed we'd catch up when he got back (and he'd get his sunnies back).

But his messages were few and far between while he was away and as it got closer to when he was meant to be back, I was starting to have second thoughts I'd see him again.

He'd changed one of his profile photos, which didn't sit well with me. I know there's no law against it, it just meant he was still looking when I wasn't.

However, I decided not to put all my eggs in one basket so changed a couple of photos in my profile too, and starting swiping right again.

Now, I don't know if he saw my updated profile and got the shits or he was just a dick all along, but he blocked my phone number and closed his Bumble account while he was away.

Never saw, or heard from him again.

And my brother is now wearing his sunglasses. Gotta take some glee from that!